A Jew and an army officer happened to be sharing a room in a crowded inn. In order to get to his train on time, the Jew was awakened by the innkeeper well before dawn. Dressing silently and quickly in the dark while hoping to avoid waking the irritable officer, the Jew accidentally put on the officers uniform. As he rushed out to the train station, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and saw that he was wearing the officer’s uniform. “That foolish innkeeper!" he thought, "He woke up the officer instead of me!”
So often, like the Jew in the story, we define ourselves - and others - by external factors. You are no doubt familiar with this scenario: you are at a party with your friend and someone that you don’t recognize walks in. You turn to your friend and ask, “Who is that?” to which they reply, “That’s Jay, or Sharon, or Ben, or Nancy” or whoever. To which you invariably respond, “Oh, what does s/he do?” We tend to identify someone based on their job, their education or their hobbies. We even introduce ourselves based on similar external factors.
Many factors will influence our life experience: e.g. where we live and where we work will influence who we meet and interact with on a regular basis; wealth or lack of it, could affect our self-confidence, our habits could affect our sense of self-worth, our relationships and so on.
But all of these aspects only reflect our current circumstances, not who we truly are, and what we can accomplish. In truth, looking at ourselves through the lens of our current stage, can even be a hindrance for growth.
In order to gain a true perspective of ourselves, and to lay the groundwork for real personal growth, we have to recognize the truly limitless potential that we have. This infinite potential stems from our soul, which is unlimited.
This is true also in our interaction with others. In order to recognize the infinite value in every single individual, we have to recognize the fact that they have a soul. We need to come to appreciate them for their essence, not their accomplishments or lack thereof.