You’ve been to a Bar Mitzvah before. You know the drill; family beaming, cameras flashing, some dancing, a nice spread and usually a Rabbi trying to communicate the real meaning of the occasion to an otherwise oblivious young man….
Ok, that last bit might be a little facetious, but we all know that there is more to Bar Mitzvah than the party. What you may not know is from where we learn the age of Bar Mitzvah.
Did you know that we learn the Bar Mitzvah age from two brothers taking swords and wiping out an entire city?!
When describing the revenge taken by two of Dinah’s brothers for her rape by the local prince, Shechem, the Torah uses the term “ish” or man. The brothers were 13 at the time and they are the youngest to be described this way in the Torah, indicating that at age 13 a child is called a man. Hence the age of Bar Mitzvah is 13 years old.
It’s a nice piece of trivia but think about it for a minute; do you know what these brothers did to avenge Dinah’s abduction and assault? That’s right – they killed every male in the entire city! The brothers held them all liable because none of them had lifted a finger to save Dinah. Is this the example we want to set? Is this what we want to communicate to a young impressionable Bar Mitzvah boy? Things don’t go your way – wipe out an entire city?!
The truth is, yes – this is an excellent lesson for a Bar Mitzvah boy! Not specifically to wipe out a city of course, but to be firm in your conviction and stand up for what you believe in.
A young man becoming Bar Mitzvah has to understand that, as a Jewish boy in a primarily non-Jewish world, there will be times that his values should differ from those around him. Teens are especially susceptible to peer pressure, a Bar Mitzvah boy needs to be well educated in his Jewish heritage so that he can maintain his standards and not be influenced by those around him. Instead he should be a guide for what’s right, just and moral to all those with whom he interacts.
May we have that strength ourselves!